An open letter to Cowboys fans. It is on perhaps one of the coldest days my testicles can recall that I congratulate you on your win. As I stare out upon the frozen water top of the trash strewn retaining pond I am reminded of Americas Team and its fans. For greater than a dozen years you Cowboys fans have remained hidden, frozen much like the old shoes, dirty diapers and papst beer cans that lay motionless beneath the ice of the pond. Yesterday was your ray of sunlight that warmed a spot on the icecap of your long and bitter exile. It will allow you to crawl out, slithering like the snakes you are, to rear your heads as if nobody has taken note of your silence for all of these years. The past few weeks have allowed the rest of us living outside of the dump pond to look into it, taking notice of the garbage, refuse and critters that inhabit that pathetic world. Let your voice roar Cowboys fans, let it echo off the walls of an empty Linc and bounce from the barren floors of sports bars across the region. Stick out your chests and show off your brand new Cowboys shirts and proclaim your life long love for your team. Do it proud, but do it swiftly for the cold chill that has kept you quiet for all of these years is closing upon you. The heat from the passing sun will soon move on and the ice will thicken again. Be sure to leave yourself enough time and excuses to scurry back to the scum pit of which you dwell. Do not forsake the rocks of which you have hidden for a decade for you will soon see, as the rest of us have for so many years...Dallas Sucks!
Nothing is not funn'able. Here we touch topics so sensitive that you may just go away hating me.